Last week were Griffin’s first days back to school following winter break. On Monday, he came home sick and spent Tuesday home too. Wednesday and Thursday we got no feedback at all, and his regular teacher was gone for the day by the time we picked him up. We just figured everything must be fine. Then Friday we got a feedback form with a laundry list of supposed crimes. He had an accident. He didn’t want to help clean up. Would we PLEASE talk to him about the importance of lesson time since it’s not all about play? Sigh.
Drew immediately balled the form up and threw it away. I had the same gut feeling, although I DID have several conversations with Griffin over the weekend about being a team player, and keeping things tidy and always respecting your parents and teachers… It is important to me that we are doing our best to support a warm environment for Griffin. That means WE have to be team players too.
Yesterday Drew had to pick up the kids without me and was cornered by Griffin’s teacher. Apparently even though she said Griffin’s day that day was “fine”, she really wanted to rehash all of the mini-transgressions that had happened on Friday. And that is something I just can’t support. I believe in parenting rooted in the present, looking toward the future. Nothing good is ever going to come from punishing a child for the past. In Griffin’s mind, last Friday might as well be last year, and that conversation has already been had. Anything we say and do now is meant to support him now, or aid him in his future.
It is so exhausting picking up your child every day knowing that the only news is bad news.
This morning when I dropped Griffin off, he was starting the day in a different teacher’s room. This teacher happens to be the one who teaches pre-k (where Griffin will move to next) and Drew and I have always adored her. I gave Griff a hug goodbye and was walking out the door when she stopped me and said “I just want you to know Griffin was in my room most of the day yesterday, and he was AWESOME. He was cheerful, and did a great job listening. He had a great day. I know all you hear is nonsense, so I really wanted to make sure you knew that.”
It seriously made my month. Its not just the fact that Griffin had a great day with her- it’s that she was kind enough to tell me about it. I immediately felt pounds of stress melting off of my shoulders. And for the first time in months, I feel confident that Griffin is going to be ok.